[Report This]Date: 17 Nov 2010 1:40:21 PM Title: Chapter 2: Emulated
Interesting. I like your writing style, but perhaps this would be better as an original story. Some of the details are a little shakey with the current paradigm within the story, such as an old victorian house in Kyoto, and Kagome having an aunt named "Fae."
Regardless, I do enjoy your prose, and your vocabulary and description skills are well developed. I look forward to reading more. Very intriguing.
Author's Response:
I don't think I'll plan for the house itself to be old, and her Aunt's name has a reason for being that way. Thank you so much for the review and your advice, I'm very glad you're engjoying my story so far. I know it sounds a bit like "The Grudge," and I'm hoping to shy away from that feel, but that's my most current horror movie, so it'll probably more relative than I'd like it to be. For now, it's still a work in progress and I'll probably edit a bit more. I reallize I should've done that before I posted it, but this is the reason I didn't: constructive critism.
Again, I truely appreciate it, and hope to keep you a satisfied reader.